This Machine Killed Cancer

Rebekah, here.

Today is Thanksgiving which means it’s been a year since Shayne was diagnosed with Lymphoma. The past 365 days feel waterlogged, like a book that’s been dropped in the bath. The pages don’t fit neatly into a one-inch binding anymore, but instead fan out in the blur of memory. I could pull out the scariest moments, but those are better left untold. Instead I’d like to remember the parts that kept us going.

November: One of our dearest friends ran the New York City Marathon for the Leukemia and Lymphoma society. Not only did she finish under her goal (3 hours 22 minutes - booyah!), she also raised over $4000 for the LLS. What she doesn’t know though is that LLS recently offered Shayne a grant to pay for some of his still outstanding medical bills. Proof that karma works.

October: Right before Shayne started his transplant, we took a quick trip to Richmond. We stayed way high up in a hotel right downtown, went to a folk festival, and found my new, favorite used bookstore, Chop Suey Books.

September: We bought a house. It looks like this. It needs a lot of love and some elbow grease, but it’s filled with the possibility of our future. A great dane leaning it’s head over the fence. Toddlers peeling out on the hard wood floors. Rooms filled with laughter. We are so very grateful for the few folks who made this possible (you know who you are).

August: “The cure for anything is salt water - sweat, tears or the sea.” - Isak Dinesen We took a long weekend trip to the beach with a few lovely folks and got all three.

July: At the end of July, we flew to California to get a second opinion from a doctor that specialized in primary CNS lymphoma. As luck would have it our extended family happened to be close by. We got to see chosen family, cousins, aunts, and even the newest addition the crew, 2-week old Evelyn.

June: phew. that benefit. all that love. i could add 1,000 more words, but it would be saying that over and over again.

May: Some of our friends + family got together and made Shayne a book + video. This made us smile on even the grayest of days.

April: Well, April was no good. It lived up to it’s April Showers + April Fools reputation. Shayne’s brain tumors were detected. We spent most of it in the hospital. Luckily our friends and, even more importantly, our family were right there by our sides.

March: A friend put together a benefit CD called This Album Kills Cancer. We discover the joy of jigsaw puzzles. It snowed a lot. I found a fantastic new job.

February: We spent a sunny afternoon at Elodie Farms with brand new baby goats (we’d hoped to have our wedding there this past fall).

January: Shayne surprised me and flew my bff from Cali in for my Birthday. In, turn she surprised us and threw us a benefit. Then helped kick off Band Against Blood Cancer which raised $191,000 for the Leukemia Lymphoma Society. (Yeah, we think she’s pretty awesome too!)

December: Shayne proposed to me! In the woods, with Christmas lights strung up in the trees. We bought a couch and a TV (two absolutely vital chemo treatment purchases). We found out we really love TV. The was the beginning of our couch sitting, silly grinning days.

November: We got married with less than a weeks notice. Some friends and family gathered in the Urban Zen Room at Beth Israel Hospital to witness our “I do’s” in skinny jeans and gray converse. At some point, we hope to have a “real” wedding. We’re still working out the details. You can read more about the story on Offbeat Bride.

Looking backwards, it’s not been such a bad year after all. We found a lot of laughter. A new perspective, a whole lot of love, and countless things to be grateful for…

Mostly I’d like to say thanks for the hugs. The understanding. Your patience. For reading this… and for loving us despite our faults, our tiredness, and our sometimes anger.

Thank you. Yes, you.